Night was never a respite from the torture of the daytime then in my marriage, not now after the divorce. Nighttime I climb into bed exhausted and relive the fear in my dreams. Divorced now a few years and I still have several nightmares a month. He stalks my dreams. The fear still exists in my head. The dreams are all different but the fear and fight for survival is the same. In the bad dreams, I am in a state of panic trying to mentally outwit him and placate him. It’s always a survival of sorts. I am just trying to get away from him.
His evil army of one invades my dreams like a poisonous cloud seeping into my mindscape, turning it into a desolate barren place of fear. One minute I am dreaming, the next he appears beside me. My brain is the only defense I have. My dreams become nightmares.
I know I need to change something. It’s that little missing piece of the puzzle in my mind.