Sorry and Forgiveness

Sorry and forgiveness are ridiculous concepts created by the guilty to alleviate their own guilt for hurting someone. It does nothing for the injured party. By apologizing, they escape the consequences of the hurtful action, whether they are actually sorry or not.  The words “I’m sorry”  are just that. Words. They evaporate into thin air the moment they are spoken. They contain no understanding in relation to the damage they are supposed to excuse.

Sorry goes hand in hand with forgiveness. Society dictates that if you say you are sorry, the other person is obligated to forgive you. Sorry and forgiveness do not erase the harm imposed upon the injured party. The guilty person gets a free pass and has no punishment for their bad behavior while the victim is left to suffer in silence. The hurt is still there, the harm has been done, trust is still broken.

This applies to my own experiences with a bipolar, mentally ill spouse. Everything he did that was ugly, nasty, abusive, mean….I’m sorry.  It just becomes meaningless and empty.  The words mean nothing at all. They have no impact on the behavior.  Nothing changes.  The hurt keeps hurting no matter how many times he speaks them. Just as forgiveness ceases to have meaning or a depth of understanding.  It just no longer exists.

I’m sorry about this post, but that’s how I feel, so please forgive me…….

 

 

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3 thoughts on “Sorry and Forgiveness

  1. I’ve been on both sides of this. I have had “I’m sorry” said to me and have it mean nothing and my “sorry” mean nothing to others. Hearing it does get old and it can become meaningless if there are no signs of change or even attempted change. Some people (I’ve done this) say sorry and sincerely try to change, but mess up again. In those situations, I think the person should be given another chance. However, if no change is attempted whatsoever and they continually use the phrase as nothing more than a free pass, then their words are just a waste of breath.

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